I need to be honest.

and maybe it will help me clear my mind. So since my little intervention-y thing, I've been eating like a normal person. I feel so fat.

But, I kindof have just been going with it. Like, when given an opportunity to lie my way out of it, I didn't take it. I just did what I was supposed to do.

But that is going to need to change. Now that I have a broken ankle, I can't go to the gym- which was my one way to rationalize all of my eating. It's also going to be very difficult to throw up, which I don't really want to do either.

So the verdict is: Hello Ana. It's nice to see you.

I've been getting really bad stomach pain as it is, especially lately, so I think that this is going to help. I really just want to feel the emptiness again and feel thin.

I dont feel thin right now.

Worst part of a cast: I can't weigh myself  :/
I dont really know how I am going to handle it to be honest.

This sucks hairy dick, just so you know.

I fucking hate having a broken ankle. And just in case you forgot or didn't know- I had knee surgery in April and was on crutches. And here I am yet again on crutches. They hurt your arms a lot more than you think. I wonder how many calories you burn on crutches....more than walking you think? It certainly takes more effort.

Anyways- here is what is going down:
1) cut back majorly on food, if any
2) try to do sit-ups and stuff that doesn't require leg movement
4) drink more water
3) be more secretive this time, bitch.

so there's that. Oh by the way since I've had my cast its been raining the entire time, which is fantasssticcccccc

Love
Elle

ps I've missed you, darlings

If that photo doesn't motivate you, you're a lost cause.

by the way- I just read some of the quite famous Dying to be Thin by Ana Regzig and it has got me so motivated. Its. Insane.