Pep Talk and Thinspo

okay so here is the deal. I have been taking this new medication that is making me eat and gain weight like crazy and its driving me to the point of extreme action. But, I keep having freakouts and eating like everything that is in my house.

But, today is a different day. Today I am absolutely sure that I will not eat. At all. Why would I need to eat anything? It won't make me happy? But it WILL make me fat. And then I will be sad again. I want to see my beautiful, lovely bones. All of them. And I know that I can do it. It's really not that difficult you know. So I am simply going to focus my attention on other things.

At school, I will pay attention in class and emerse myself in the teachings. At home I will paint, listen to music, and if necessary just sleep to avoid it all. Breakfast is easily avoided. When I get to school, the first thing I will do is just throw my lunch away. (I try to put things back normally to not just waste money). Then, I will find a way out of dinner somehow.

Okay Elle? You know you've got this. You've done it so many times before. Just think of the thinness before you make a bad decision. You can do it you can do it you can do it.

It's not quite 6:30 am so my day is just beginning and I am ready to absolutely not screw this up.

Alright :)

Here we go.
Elle